I’m a her and a she. Don’t take my gender identity away from me because you can’t decide what you want to be. Gender identity is different from sexual identity.
I’d give the rest of the solution, but the social engineers and government psychologists indicate it must come from a transgender person thus I won’t get credit for my work.
Historically, when I found a solution, they’d just steal it and put some other author’s name from the appropriate group the solution was designed for and threaten me in various behind the scenes ways to shut up about it.
Animal rights people do the same thing, steal the work of others, put their name to it, and claim privilege over and ownership rights to another’s intellectual material/work citing the ‘common good or common cause’ reasons for the plagiarism/theft of another’s brain products. Or they’ll attach ‘anonymous’ to it – like I’ve ever been anonymous!!
Some even had the audacity to trademark and register what they stole.
The Blacks are big on that. Take your words, apply them to their cause, then claim ownership.
That every large and small group does it, doesn’t make it right. Operatives working for/with governments do it. They’re always trolling for new material to steal from one and give or sell to another.
“They can’t prove it” is their excuse for doing it. Even Barack Obama shouted out that he loved stealing other people’s material. He, while president of the United States actually thought it was okay to steal the work of somebody else. That’s when I started questioning his integrity. Remember, “You can do it, I know you can?” (We, I) can do it, Yes (We, I) can?
In fact all the intellectual material thieves think it’s okay, until someone steals from them something they worked hard to develop or something they valued.
In India they used to cut off the hands of children who stole. In Africa, they’d put a tire around your neck, fill it with gasoline and set it on fire and watch you burn – for stealing a car. They stole four of mine, back to back just so they wouldn’t have to take a city bus.
So when the shoes on the other foot, it’s always a different story.
The FBI even said they owned everyone’s intellectual by law. That statement begs to know which law? I never did find such a law that claimed the FBI owned all my intellectual material – in other words, brain products. If I build a house, the FBI owns the blueprints I drew up to make it from?
You don’t have to eat brains to replace the one you say you have, but never use.
If you’re using a biased gut instead of your brains to solve your problems or to demand something from someone else, that you could provide yourself, you’re always going to be at the low end of the success stick.
If you don’t know how to brush your teeth well, then buying a new brush won’t help much after the novelty wears off.
If there’s only room for one person in your life and that person is you, don’t cry when your relationships don’t last beyond the meet, greet, and now I know you stage.
What’s a sidewinder? In cowboy terms. Southwestern USA. Northwestern MEXICO. I heard that word on television growing up watching westerns that were popular back in the day fresh off the reservation.
I heard Morgan Freeman say that word on a talk show referring to stereotypes of black African men. Sidewinder and shifty too.
It’s a reptilian hemorrhoid. Or more accurately a venomous humanoid with horns who is highly intelligent. In other words a snake, that can run at eighteen miles an hour and bite you in the ass without you knowing it.
In my expansive world view that sounds more like African women than African men.
It’s okay to ignore your gut when the facts are staring you in the face.
The Brits are always scolding people about pitying themselves. They don’t like it and they’ll put you down in a beat. But these same people expect the ones they beat for pitying themselves to pity everybody else.
So pity to them is only okay when you’re not giving it to yourself.
What does that really mean?
I’m wondering if some people get overlooked using that strategy of doling out pity.
Why not let people decide for themselves? It doesn’t seem fair that I should be giving all the pity and not be assured of receiving my fair share. That’s discrimination, and why should the British control pity anyway?
The only way to guarantee fairness, which the Brits claim they support, is if one pities themselves and others at their will and not the will of others – namely British here.
Lookin’ for some free pity Sharon?
Nope, just makin’ a pity point. Fair is fair, even on the small points.
When you control the little things you control the big things. That’s what the British do and they never stop doing it. It could drive a person bloody mad and many of them are.
If you discriminate on the little things, you’ll discriminate on the bigger things.
“Your view has been noted”, said Lord Brown. I never forgot that.
Nobody cares about black history month except Blacks and even most of them don’t care.
I didn’t even like history classes in school – never did – it’s about war and more war and who fought, who won or lost, names, dates, people wanting to be famous or remembered.
I didn’t like memorizing all that data that meant nothing to me. Women, according to the history books I read, weren’t even there. What did they do? Cook, clean and raise kids – that wasn’t even mentioned.
I don’t care about the past. Nobody learns anything by studying the past except how to repeat it.
So I have to wonder why black people want a whole month dedicated to them. It seems there’s always something black-inspired going on in every month.
What do white people get? I wouldn’t know; I’ve never considered myself white. That’s what black people call me.
I’m Lithuanian, Scottish, British, Irish and Welsh. One grandmother, nobody knows her heritage other than upstate New York and a touch of Dutch – meaning not much, but what happened to the other ninety-five percent of her?
She said I had Indian blood in me. I didn’t ask questions back then, none of it mattered. I was a mongrel with blue eyes.
Later ancestry.com tested my DNA and I was a whole lot more so I just call myself the United Nations to myself. Just so you know, ancestry.com can give and take away your heritage history, so I don’t hold a lot of stock in history – anyone’s version of it.
I’m about the here and now.
Why do black people think white people should care about their history when they have histories of their own that go way back to other countries? The European children who were brought against their will are all dead now, so what’s the point?
How about all those European families who had nine to twelve kids in America so they could work the farms so the family could eat? They’re all dead too, so what’s the point of resurrecting them? Guess you could call them child slaves living at home.
Ask any person on the street how old America is – black or white – and no one will get it right, unless it’s staged using actors and they’re told what to say.
America is a young country. Continental African countries have been around a lot longer, so they should have been the example for the newer developing nations.
Instead, Americans soared through the wilderness to make a life out of sky, dirt and trees at great cost of human suffering, while Africa today remains a developing continent. Nobody calls North or South America or Europe or Asia developing continents
Some of the oldest so-called civilizations in the world made no noteworthy historical contributions to society as a whole, that weren’t given to them by some other outside culture – in recent history.
They have children who in 2021 still walk mostly naked, ridden with disease, still scratching dirt for live worm snacks, roads and paths littered with trash, dropped where they finished with it, with no plans to devise trash-designated areas, with pick up and drop off times?
Except for the worm snacks I saw this same behavior by black people in the slum areas of Cleveland where I once lived. So how have they advanced?
Who would want to know that history? They don’t have to read about it, the world can see it right in front of them on television. Nothing much has changed.
Some cultures are simply like that, they resist change at every level with too many people involved in the decision making processes that end in no decisions being made. There is rarely a consensus or a mandate except in areas that involve violence where they are more pro than con.
That’s what I see. There’s nothing underneath, hidden or deep about it. That’s how they present themselves to the world. That’s my synopsis.
It’s the way you live and the motivation to survive and thrive where you are right now, no matter your socio-economic status that puts you on the developed and improving road.
It’s not the amount of money, it’s what you do with what you have. Always expecting somebody else to dry your tears with their ingenuity and hard work with no contribution from you is not the road to a developed individual, family, town or nation – or continent.
It’s a plan that makes them stagnate as a developing nation instead of an improving nation, which essentially means, ‘can’t stand on their own’ classification, which means ‘needs assistance in all areas of sufficiency, which translates to burden.
So they war against those who can do, to make others give them what they’re too feeble to achieve.
War is their answer for achievement. Steal rather than create.
America is 245 years old.
Look where America has come in 245 years compared to where Africans on continental Africa have come in many thousands of years.
According to at least one black sports writer the most prominent black people in America work for the NBA (National Basketball Association).
This happens to be an organization where it is acceptable to physically abuse workers for lackluster job performances with ‘ass whoppin’s’. And there is no plan being discussed to transition beyond physical pain used to motivate black people to improve their performance.
That this still exists in 2021 and the black community ignores it is why continental Africa and African communities in all countries are still in the third world developing stage, rather than in the stage of improvement.
Africans would rather fight to take what others create rather than create their own noteworthy history.
All tribes, clans and cultures used slaves. They still do. Now they get green cards or work visas to enter foreign countries to work at jobs for wages commensurate with their lack of sophisticated skills or knowledge of the language where they work.
In America the most prominent black people are the ones who play ball games in public for millions of dollars and no societal rules. They use, abuse and destroy lives at their leisure.
Black boys want to be famous ball players or gangsters and black girls want to be Hollywood.
When reality sets in they all blame some other group of people for not becoming rich and famous, rather than choosing another more realistic goal and achieving it. Even then if they fail to achieve what they set out to do, it’s always somebody else’s fault.
Studying anybody’s history will not make a better life right here right now. Only the individual can do that in their own way, by making their own mistakes and rising from their own ashes to try again in a different way or doing something totally new.
I’m down on history. You can raise up slavery all you want, but I want children to aspire beyond that.
Blacks rub their children’s noses into a history that never existed for them; it existed for their ancestors, yet they’re taught to internalize those slave ancestors, so they never forget where they came from, so they can perpetuate the exploitation of white people who weren’t even born when their dark families sold them down the river for thirty pieces of silver.
That’s a history that’s tough to shake – your own family being breeders of humans – selling their own. Blacks have a history of distancing themselves from caring about their children for that reason. They have yet to fully recover their bonding skills.
Hey, Chinese ate their own. They ate their neighbor’s children, so they wouldn’t feel the shame and sorrow of breeding to eat part of themselves. They learned to shut down a part of their conscience so they could do it. They have yet to recover that lost part.
They procreated workers in the image of themselves. They knew how to do it. They used their bodies to survive and thrive.
It may appear selfish, yet at the same time it was an option that was comfortable. They did not have to go outside the workings of their own bodies to survive. They stood by that, even if at times …
Well, everybody knows those times and those thoughts even though they didn’t or wouldn’t have engaged in those same behaviors.
Not long ago a health department inspector discovered the frozen body of a young Chinese girl in a restaurant freezer somewhere in the Cleveland area. Authorities chose to believe the family was holding it there until arrangements could be made. The Chinese community knew in their hearts something different occurred – something taboo in Western cultures.
Why so few cemeteries in Asia?
How did the ones who didn’t sell their own or eat their own survive?
It wasn’t much of a leap to jump to other species for their survival and then to actually raise those animals for slaughter, rather than capture them in the wild.
People still do eat humans in many rural and some affluent regions – too many to still exist in 2o21. What’s being done about that?
Take that history and shove it – I’m not interested in failure or anybody’s bad feelings about the past. I’m outta there!
I’m not going to burn your olive tree farm village town city down if you don’t do what I tell you to do, all the while screaming for you to see me.
I’m not going to hire recruit HIRED GUNS to terrorize communities and a nation and the world and call myself and my actions nonviolent, because I consider those actions justifiable when not done by me personally.
Everybody already saw you and most didn’t like what they saw, so rather than force you to change, they chose the nonviolent route of turning the other cheek so they wouldn’t have to visually endure your barbarism.
I’m not going to demand of you what I don’t demand of myself. I suggest you follow what you preach to be the example of purity that you demand in others.
Compassion doesn’t mean allowing certain groups to commit harmful acts against other individuals and groups with impunity.
So you don’t like rules, but you like making rules for everyone around you.
Hypocrisy in these uncertain times has become the rule rather than the exception. Nobody sees it in themselves, because they see themselves as right and their harmful actions against you as justifiably correct.
You hurt them so they hurt you.
Usually the ones who get hurt in any war are the ones who had nothing to do with the harmful actions on either side and had no power to change them.
They’re the nobodies both sides enlist to fight their wars rather than settle disputes before they get too large to settle with already too many entities on either side hurting and dictating terms out of anger, frustration and greed.
Garnering world support for punitive actions signals impending world war.
Garnering world support for cooperative actions signals impending peace, which includes everyone equally.
Leaving no child behind or adult behind or person behind always leaves somebody behind. That’s how the term ‘falling through the cracks’ came into being. Too many rules made after the main goal is agreed on in theory, spoils the plan practically into nonexistence is the path of least resistance that leads nowhere.
At my late stage in life I have yet to witness a drive anywhere in the world for PeaceWithoutSacrifice.
So you don’t like rules. Nobody does unless the rules benefit themselves. Historically that meant too many received no benefit or less benefit when those with louder voices made the most noise.
CORONACOVID the new invisible enemy.
The individual and collective DNA both physical and mental is changing at rapid speed in all animals in which CORONACOVID survives and thrives long enough to set those processes in motion, which makes CORONACOVID an activating agent.
And all animals or processes who and that transmit CORONACOVID, like a bee pollenating the pistil of the stigma, become spreading agents, whether individuals or groups recognize it or not. Recognition is not a prerequisite for altering an organism that survives the CORRECTION.
If the spreading animal is not successful, the wind, either natural or manufactured (as in air circulating systems) will complete the job.
I now have intimate experience and unfolding knowledge of this coronacovid 2019/20/21 virus and all its intricacies. It now exists in every cell of my 159 pound 5 foot 8 inch body.
It no longer matters if you like the rules. The universe gave you sufficient time to change yourself for the betterment of all, while you dragged your feet and pounded your fists, as predicted, demanding a sweeter deal for yourself. In return for what?
The universe moved right through you as if you weren’t there. It doesn’t care if you catch up or not. Slackers have no value in a changing world. You’re probably on the ‘slated for extinction’ list anyway.
The universe doesn’t wait for stubborn.
The universe isn’t big on color either in case you never looked at it. Color doesn’t matter. I never saw black or brown in a rainbow. Even rainbows don’t matter. What do rainbows contribute to progress?There are a lot of shades of white, cream and gray out there. Those aren’t colors to black Africans, but that’s what most of the universe looks like.
Night and day don’t have colors either.
God doesn’t differentiate animals by their color, like the Africans do to themselves trying to get noticed. In all the screaming and burning of cities and people over the black animal mattering, nothing was offered in the way of skills that would contribute to the change they scream the world needs. Peace is a skill by the way that the black animal screaming for recognition doesn’t possess.
They proposed that white people do the work of peace – as they historically and traditionally always have – after they terrorize and beat them into submission until they conform to the black African way.
NO REVENGE. NO PEACE is their motto. What century are they living in? That’s a war plan based on barbarism. Falsely accusing people of crimes they didn’t commit, then conducting street trials sentencing them to suffer by taking their livelihoods and businesses from them, then banishing them from the marketplace to leave their families destitute. That’s the black African way.
That continues to be their offer and they are in the process of destroying white lives to use as their tools, since they don’t have anything to offer of themselves.
God rejected that offer and no counter proposals were made that would move the planet forward in a rapid expedient progressive manner.
Only one person on the planet showed up with skills and a PLAN that contains ONLY FIVE RULES, with flexibility in the first and second, while making no demands for preferential treatment based on her’s or anyone else’s minority or majority status.
Her name is Sharon Lee Davies-Tight.
The rules are no prejudice, discrimination, enslavement, torture and slaughter. One leads to the other if left unchecked.
On that continuum we all start in the prejudice category, prejudging everything and everyone that enters our sphere in a multitude of ways, as nature intended for our survival. All animals share that nature – no matter the color.
What you do with that knowledge leads either to surviving and thriving or moves us to the next category of discrimination.
We all discriminate, based on experience and tastes.
What we do with that knowledge determines whether we use it to survive and thrive without infringing on anyone else’s right to survive and thrive, or we step over a line into enslavement.
The rest is self-explanatory. But in case it’s too complicated for the minds of the stubborn animals among the human race: enslavement leads to torture and torture leads to slaughter, unless it’s stopped at any juncture.
Stopping it by using enslavement, torture and slaughter has not proven to be a successful method, since it’s based on discrimination, which benefits some not all.
No individual or group of humans has presented a plan for all to move from the present into a better future, except Sharon Lee Davies-Tight.
Changing the world by changing ourselves™ is the quickest and least painful route to PeaceWithoutSacrifice™.
Why So Many Humans Believe God Exists – It’s a parallel.
We can’t see the mind, even with the highest powered microscope. But we know we have one. We see the result of it. We experience it in others. It’s called thinking that results in action.
We’re beginning to see that non-human animals also have a mind. We see the result of it. Although it’s called thinking most scientists, wanting to be superior to all other animals, call it instinct. Instinct is an automatic response by the nervous system within the body to outside or internal stimuli. Humans also operate on instinct.
The reason humans so easily accept the existence of God, a universal force which they cannot actually see, is because they do that with themselves. They have a mind which they cannot actually see and are witness to their own actions created by that mind.
We accept that we were created by something that we cannot see. And because we see the result of that creative action, and because it’s so complex that no one human mind could have done it, we theorize that something greater in all aspects did it, and that we are the living proof of that action.
That greater something most humans have come to refer to is God.
We accept that we have a functional mind and we use it for whatever we do while alive.
If I tell my brain what to do, then what do I call that part of me that does that?
The concept of God is turned into the reality of the existence of God, by what we see in the universe, that we humans did not create, much like the concept of our mind is turned into the reality of the existence of our mind – by what our mind can produce through thought followed by action based on those thoughts.
The existence of our minds parallels the existence of God.
Humans instinctively know that, though they haven’t managed to put it into words. Religions prohibit independent thought on all issues regarding God and the specific tenets of their corresponding doctrines.
Yeah you’re right, Mama’s cookin’ with coronacovid in every cell of her body. Yes, her brain is her body too. The brain extends to all cells in the body via the nerve network.
Bones, skin, fat, muscle, blood, fluids, organs, blood vessels, nerves, glands, hair, nails, teeth, eyes – all of it is affected, even where blood vessels and nerve networks don’t traverse. My nails and hair grew like weeds. My teeth got longer.
I’ve been assaulted by coronacovid.
Where there is a healthy cell, there is coronacovid actively engaged in trying to alter my DNA to accept its existence.
Sitting on the fence creates uncertainty which leads to other countries voting against Palestine. And the British know this. At least be honest about your intentions.
Making Palestine terrorist-free cannot be a precondition for anything. Can Britain or any other country claim to be terrorist-free? No, because the terrorists operate within and on the behalf of government – same as every country.
As always, law enforcement and terrorism agencies/bureaus look for terrorists in all the wrong places due to political influencers, past history and their own personal prejudices. They pay more attention and spend more time watching trolls on social media than they do looking for real terrorists.
If they took appropriate measures to prevent political coups by foreign investors with foot soldiers already on American soil with many more on the way, dressed to blend in with children in strollers, then organized grassroots vigilantes won’t feel compelled to save their nation, because FBI and Homeland Security are too reticent to stand up for the institutions and the people they are sworn to protect.
Since when is it the USAs job to protect the right of Jews to seek, using any means necessary, a Jewish majority in Palestine or anywhere else in the world? Since when is it the USAs job to feed Black Americans, the skin of White Americans to appease their insatiable thirst for blood, power and war?
Where’s the CIA in Central America? Why do USA citizens have to pay out four billion dollars from the taxes they pay for USA public services to make Central Americans stay home? Those individuals rushing to the border won’t get any of that money. It’s a pay off to Central American politicians, just like the cartels do. Now we do it.
How many USA politicians get paid by the USA cartels to turn a blind eye? Nancy Pelosi? She supports the cartels, as long as they torture and kill their own – keep it in the family in other words. Sounds like Mafia-based appeasement to me. And those supposedly walking north to join up with the USA cartels; it’s okay for the cartels to torture and kill them too? Watch what you say. Trump never did have a monopoly on ‘not thinking through the words before he spoke them’, as the democrats kept insisting he did.
Mitch McConnell? Who is he protecting in this USA drug war to monopolize the up and coming drug growing and distribution in the USA? Are we already growing poppies to make heroin and coca to make cocaine?
Why does Joe Biden recklessly pay politicians in Central America, yet won’t give the real citizens of the USA the coronacovid stimulus checks he promised? Now he wants to negotiate the stimulus checks. I didn’t see him negotiating with Central American Cartels. Or was that already done before the CIA got him elected president? Now there’s a coup for you. The CIA stages a silent a coup in its own country? Who would believe that? Jews in Palestine would believe it.
Sounds like extortion to me. Is everybody sleeping? You’re more worried about somebody criticizing Jews for enslaving Palestinians on Palestinian land, than someone blowing up the USA southern border to open the flood gates for cartel workers looking for employment in the USA?
How many more cartels are you going to allow to exist in the USA? Do they bring all their equipment with them when they cross the border? You know, all their seeds, fertilizer, packing materials? No? Then from whom do they buy their equipment once they’re here? Central Americans aren’t fleeing away from the cartels in Central America; they’re fleeing to the cartels in the USA.
Do your job and stop giving Antifa and Black Lives Terrorists full reign to destroy American towns and cities, and those grassroots vigilantes that you smear with white supremacist labels will work with you, instead of alone, to save this nation from dropping into the hands of terrorists dressed like people going to a ball game with children in tow.
I know, I know, the Jews who are conveniently placed in all influential USA institutions won’t allow a shift in focus away from their Jewish majority agenda, that is quickly spreading worldwide by the way. Once again, nobody sees it, even though the proof is right in front of them.
You’re way off the mark. We’ve already been hit.
Hey, figure it out. I can’t handle your Jew Junk today, so steer clear. I’m operating from a fully invaded coronacovid organism, and I’m not in the mood for your feigned stupidity.
Work and work fast.
Antifa, Antifa supporters, those who hate Trump supporters, Black Lives Terrorists who have yet to condemn violence against white people, and violent actions prior to, during and after their so-called peaceful protests, including the Obamas, are inciting THE WHITE RISING.
You lost sight of the fact, that white people are the minority worldwide and are often referred to by non-white peoples as the Satan.
Does anybody even read what Africans from Africa say on social media about white people? Or are they only looking for people who speak the word Jew? Anyone who says the word Jew is anti-Semitic? And they need to be punished by you? Whoa. Whoa. You sure got taken for a Jew ride.
Just as black and brown people want to preserve their identity and often take violent measures to secure it, the same will be true for white people, whose identities the blacks and browns want to eliminate – just as the Jews are eliminating the identity of the Palestinian people. It’s being done as I write; it’s been on-going for decades and nobody saw it.
Everybody needs to stop using the word Zionist. Why use a word that 99% of the world or more, doesn’t know what it means?
That’s a ‘tell’.
Nobody differentiates between blacks, browns, whites within the group, except to call out white supremacists, so how about whoever these Zionists are, we call them Jew supremacists? I think that should work for the people who insist on fostering the existence of elitist groups.
So now we’ve got white, black, brown and Jew supremacists. See? Now the Jews will make of this that I just gave them the added classification of race, which they’ve coveted for a very long time. Should I have done that?
I didn’t. They did. Do I agree that they’re a race? No. They spread their seeds into every human group, nation, country, territory, area, island on earth (and maybe some non-humans), so there are half and third and quarter Jews all over the planet – in all races, in all ethnicities, so no, they can’t be called a race. They are in races, like the coronacovid virus is in me. That does not make me a virus.
Those race-erasing actions are already well underway in the USA against all white people and for some blind-sided reason, members of law enforcement and anti-terrorism and counter-terrorism entities who seek terrorists are looking to the victims of terrorism as their targets.
When the world treats black and brown supremacy the same as white supremacy, then the world will be on the right track and future moves to educate sensitivity for all races will flow naturally from equal treatment.
Revenge creates more revenge. So far, the social engineers have not been operating on the front lines, where they should be. They don’t want to get hurt. That’s all about to change. They got it all wrong when they started controlling people’s moods from behind the scenes and actually fed human beings to other human beings for appeasement purposes.
It created a feeding frenzy that is now out of control. Reigning in white people has never worked long term, because when blacks and browns are fed white skins, eventually they come back to demand more.
Revenge racism creates more racism. It validates it.
OPEN THE EYES TO YOUR SOUL.
If white supremacists are terrorists, then black and brown supremacists are terrorists.
If black is beautiful, then so are white and brown beautiful.
If blacks can raise their fists as a symbol of black power, then so can whites and browns raise their fists as their symbols of white and brown power.
By allowing one to do it, and not the other creates the prejudice which leads to the discrimination.
Remember, the blacks have the upper hand with the fist. Their fist is a symbol of violence. Blacks often and freely use their fists against women, children, each other, against whites and browns. The black fist has nothing to do with racial injustice. It’s a symbol of how they fight. They don’t fight with conciliatory or cooperating words used to open doors; they fight with might – both words and fists are violent. They believe people must die for change to happen. People must suffer. They are full of the fight.
Societies can’t keep changing to adjust to immoral behavior, so as not to be attacked. Eventually people must take a stand against corruption in all cultures.
That will happen, and unlike the black ideology, it won’t take another world war to accomplish what each individual has right now in their possession to make it happen in their private and public lives.
Each individual already has the tools. They will use them. They will also know when someone behind the scenes is forcing their social engineering strategies into their minds and will automatically block the incoming messages when designed to control by psychological paralysis, rather than facilitate one’s right to survive and thrive, without picking one group over another.
People in the USA government think that people who don’t drink are terrorists. I don’t know if that stems from the 9-11 Attacks Against Israel via America or if that particular prejudice was operating prior to 9-11.
Muslims characteristically don’t consume alcohol, or at least those who become radicalized don’t. I wonder if on the night before they are scheduled to martyr themselves, when they purportedly go to a bar and consume alcohol and women, if that was the first time. If not, then some paradigms need another look.
The generalized prejudice against anyone, Muslim or not, who doesn’t drink is that they’re a terrorist. It’s the one factor among many that stands out and for whatever reason became the motivating variable that automatically moves one into the person of interest category, if that person has in some way for whatever benign or sinister reason come to the proper department’s attention.
Tell someone you wet the bed when you were young and they automatically put you into the serial killer category. Someone once said that out of all the distinguishing characteristics of serial killers that’s the one they all had in common. All? Are you sure? All doesn’t seem to fit when referencing groups or characteristics. Maybe most, maybe many. Who knows, except the scientists who interpret the statistics using formulas and equations.
You can be sure though that out of the many adults who wet the bed when they were children, the percentage who went on to become serial killers is statistically insignificant.
That’s an example of how statistics when made public discriminate against people, when only half of the stats are given.
I consume alcohol, but I’m not caring much about it anymore. I wonder if I stop drinking long term, not just because there’s a pandemic, if that will put me back into the person of interest category, whereby government forces will use that as a reason to become more invasive in their surveillance and manipulation of my life?
I wonder if some alcohol, drug and/or sex addicted congressperson will get paranoid and sound the 9-11 alarm, because they don’t like my views or because I have the audacity to criticize Jews on their terrorist ideologies? Or any other group whose ideologies and/or membership I won’t pledge allegiance to.
Good strategy though for the alcohol, tobacco and gun lobby to make people afraid not to drink to keep from being labeled and pursued as a person of interest – terrorist in other words.
With all the addicted people in the country and the damage to families and society it does, why encourage people to drink using fear tactics?
Profits are down.
Ever hear of a drinking terrorist? If anyone knows how to terrorize it’s a raging alcohol addict.
Hallowed be thy name.
Once again, you’re targeting all the wrong people.
Who wrote the line reflecting that people with lots of mirrors in their living spaces are narcissists?
Mirrors create the illusion of space. Thus a small living space looks larger with mirrors. I know. I do it.
Russians historically created the illusion of space in their interior designs by the use of mirrors. It was in Russia (then the Soviet Union) that I learned it.
I want to return to Russia before I die. Moscow and St. Petersburg (then called Leningrad).
I never did see the evil in Vladimir Lenin that the world saw. I suppose living in a world where the elite dictated to the populace, it was only natural that when it became time for the social order to reform, that the working class rise to accept those challenges.
Most often our evolution means forward-thinking which means, or should, less suffering in the present, not the past because the past is gone except for postjudice purposes.
But what about our evolutionary present, where we are at any given moment, how we present ourselves to ourselves and then to the world?
Advancing oneself in the present requires knowledge of the past, not exploitation of something that no longer exists, your status now and a future you know to be possible given your animal limitations.
How do you present your evolutionary self to the world – past present future?
Pull from your evolutionary gut that which you can control and leave the rest to wither.
Do you know what I learned about addicts over the years? They are immersed in their experiences to the exclusion of everyone else.
Everyone else is a prop.
Everyone has a wagon in their mind.
Addiction is natural animal behavior – repeat repeat repeat.
When is religion too much? Ask a factory worker. How many addicts work in factories?
I meant when is repetition too much.
Is discipline addictive?
There’s discipline in no discipline. It takes focus and effort to throw everything in the ‘follow the wind’ bin.
Just follow the wind at every start and stop and twist and turn and hurricane tornado calm before something bad happens.
I moved the furniture today this early morning. I move my stuff around a lot – for greater convenience productivity aesthetic value. It helps my work not to stay stagnant.
I have five work stations in my 700 square foot apartment. Two actively used computers for my use only. I don’t have to reach far when a thought demands to be written. The bathroom is off limits. No work goes on there.
I remember Oprah once bragging about talking on the phone when sitting on the toilet. To me that’s perverse and disrespectful. Wait till you’re done. Some years later I realized that fat people spend an inordinate amount of time on the toilet emptying what they ate and they eat a lot. And often. Imagine the work involved on the other end in order to stay as fat as required to create that work load.
Three animals live here – two humans and one canine – and I involve their personalities in every move I make in this little castle near the lake.
It’s too overwhelming that each time I see, think about or interact with a black person I have to see, think about and interact with the entire race – billions of people – whereby the individual is no longer singular but a multitude upon multitudes.
That’s mind control at work by terrorists who want to own your thoughts, impressions and perceptions.
That’s proof that in black culture the black individual DOES NOT MATTER.
Now that’s racism. I’ve never witnessed racism as pervasive and subversive as that.
If it worked on and against me, then it’s working on and against all whom move – even on and against their own.
That’s evil and that’s dangerous – to even want to own and control another’s thoughts, but everybody, all animals included? Their souls too. Soul Food they call it because they killed the animal whose soul they wanted to consume. Religious sacrifice. Black magic.
That’s terrorism at work incognito subversive (IS).
That’s the game plan. Ugly and smooth so you don’t notice the moves until you wake up to the horror that their ugly attacked you with a smile and have a blessed day to distract you from their truth.
Satan won THIS round.
OR SO NATAS THINKS. Smooth me once…not too smart of Natas.
The underground black leadership wouldn’t let Barack Obama say he was half white. To this day he dances all around the issue.
He essentially denied his white race. Sure, by saying his mother was white he didn’t deny her race, but come to think of it, if he didn’t deny hers, then why deny his by omission?
Maybe she really wasn’t his mother. His grandfather was CIA, so who knows what really went on there. He said he was a black man because his skin was black.
His white didn’t matter because no one could see it. So even Obama thought through his skin without looking any deeper.
That’s stereotyping. Skin color told the whole story in his view. Yet he became President of the USA. And still it’s not enough.
It would go a long way in the white community for him to publicly announce his true races. He is biracial – black and white.
That he doesn’t feel the need to do it when black lives terrorists are systematically terrorizing the world on his behalf is hypocritical, self-serving and hurtful to all those white people who supported him, who were not racist.
Now all of a sudden they don’t matter. Who’s the racist now?
I remember sitting at the dining room table me and Dad when I told him about an electric pencil sharpener I bought as I excitedly and in disbelief told him all about how it worked and he said, “Yeah I know…I’ve got one at work”.
Come to find out they all had them.
I was devastated. That I didn’t know and more so that he didn’t tell me.
To me it was near miraculous that you could stick a pencil in a hole and it would automatically sharpen it. The absence of a crank handle impressed me the most, since all through school they all had handles. I wanted to share it with him and all this time he had one.
I’m laughing about it now that I thought he would have shared that knowledge with me, but more so that I felt devastated. To him it was no big deal. Or maybe he thought I’d probably want one.
Well it didn’t matter because I had one now.
Looking back I think I mattered more than I did.
I’m still laughing inside. Guess that’s a good thing.
God says it’s absurd to eat the bacon from the pig, then take the pig’s heart when the human heart fails because of the bacon the human ate. Think before you eat.
God is power, raw power. How you use that power is to some extent your choice. Although you’re programmed to use it to survive, while respecting the survival rights of others, there is no alternative or opposing power to make sure that you do–except you.
God says people will do humiliating things in order to achieve the peace that drugs promise (only for a short while), till the intensity for the drug supersedes the intensity of the drug, and a true condition of self-enslavement occurs.
God says if you don’t spend money, you’ll worry less about not having it.
God says to those who use the fact that Jesus drank as an excuse for them to drink: Jesus wouldn’t have put himself in a position to be crucified if he had been sober. Jesus offered his life as the last human sacrifice, to teach his people to stop sacrificing people at the altar to obtain favors from God. Bread and wine you will offer instead of body and blood. He could have found a better way to make the same point. He fought violence with violence–his own. It just might be time to start turning wine into water. There will be no sacrificial offerings to any God.
God’s forgotten children? That’s how you describe the homeless, physically and brain challenged, the diseased and starving children? They are not forgotten by God; they’re forgotten by your God.
God says don’t poison your day with other people’s venom communicated via the television, radio, magazines, newspapers, advertisements, books.
God says woe is the world that brainwashes its people into apathy. For when the need arises to act, everyone remains silent, as conditioned. Unease springs us into action.
God says years ago the word of the day was that people were more similar than different. Everyone accepted that premise, so much so, that stereotypes (that which makes a group different from another group) became obsolete, leading to the concept of political correctness. Simultaneously we were told to celebrate peoples’ differences, but nobody told us what those differences were. Now that the world is exploding with terrorism–of every type–it’s time to recognize those differences and learn from them.
God says hiding your nationality through ‘ethnic blending’ is not necessarily a good idea nor a survival advantage, if you maintain underground networks as a result.
God says who, unless they’ve been brainwashed by the slaughter industries, would continue to eat diseased and toxin-ridden eggs, animals and fish? When you hard boil your eggs to kill the salmonella in them, you’ve been brainwashed into eating something you shouldn’t be eating. If vegetables harbor salmonella, then processing farms are washing them with contaminated water.
God says we must protect our activists, not punish them through harassment and containment, with the purpose of prohibiting their ideas from reaching the populace. If left out there long enough, the ideas will either be accepted by the populace or rejected, which is how it should be in an evolutionary democracy. Stale ideas (those which are not embraced) simply fade away–on their own, maybe to gain popularity at some other time, when the world is ready. Governments need to give the people more say in what they accept and reject, rather than trying to make those decisions for them by keeping new views out of their reach. Without new ideas we would all be perpetually stuck in the status quo, never to progress.
God says just because somebody doesn’t like something, doesn’t mean it isn’t any good. And, just because somebody doesn’t like you doesn’t mean you’re not likable.
God says when you eat all the cows and all the pigs and all the chickens, your taste for flesh will not abate until you eat your own and then it’s too late.
God says use humor in your life, but not at the expense of someone else, or even yourself when it means poking fun at something about yourself or others that cannot be changed: race, color, gender, heritage, affliction, social or economic status, etc.
God says sticks and stones can break your bones, but names can also hurt you.
God says we have no right to enslave animals to study them, any more than we have a right to enslave humans to study them. We do both with impunity. Stop it.
Religious preachers say, know God through Jesus Christ. I say, know God through yourself. God reaches you through the God in you. When you recognize the God in you, you’ll recognize it in others–all others. If you don’t recognize it in all others, then you’re not recognizing the God in yourself either.
God says no human has a right to take another’s gift, nor to prevent another from using their gift.
God says before you remove a splinter in someone else’s eye, remove the plank from your own, connotes that your prejudices are larger than your neighbor’s. Though that may be true, it isn’t always true. You can indeed point out a prejudice in another before you recognize your own, and also if you already recognize your own.
So, why do some people cling to the Old Testament and deny the new? God says the Old Testament condones revenge, punishment, and reward through greed. The New Testament is about forgiveness, feeding the poor, clothing the naked, caring for the sick, visiting the imprisoned. It really has nothing to do with what is historically accurate. It’s more difficult to do the later than the former. Revenge gets a stronger grip on us than does love, because it’s difficult to love those who offend you. Any one of us could sit down and write stories about our life and the lessons we’ve learned, and each person within the story would write a different version of it.
God says no one person has a monopoly on knowing what’s right and what’s wrong. Only the God in us knows that. The true test of right and wrong is not putting yourself in the other person’s position, but stripping yourself of all prejudice and selfishness in any given situation you’re examining.
God says don’t look for quick answers to complex questions.
Back to the plank: Assume we all have planks. We blame God when something bad happens, but give ourselves praise when something good comes our way. People who don’t rely on God have a misperception of what God is. They’re defining God by someone else’s standards. Such people perceive such reliance as weak, when in fact, it is quite liberating. Imagine being able to turn all your concerns over to God, and to trust that God is always with you, supporting you, no matter what happens–good or bad, and working with you in a team effort to solve or resolve all of your issues.
Every creature has it’s own special relationship with God. A common thread, however, is God’s special concern for all creatures. That thread is the God-force itself sown into all life and non-life by a sower larger and smaller than any human could ever fathom. God is the closest friend you’ll ever have, and someone with whom you can talk in total privacy–unless tortured and given bean-spilling drugs. Even then, God will scramble that which no person has a right to hear. God will never abandon you. Though others may want that to happen, for whatever reason, it simply cannot happen. Not all things are possible.
God says the people most comfortable in life are those who collectively follow a set of rules that they don’t question, regardless of the rightness or wrongness of those rules. To question makes one uncomfortable, but then courage rarely feels good.
God says stop trying to interpret someone else’s experiences. Interpretations by someone else are never correct, and certainly never complete.
God says when you look into my eyes and see God, you’re seeing you. When you look into my eyes and see evil, you’re also seeing you. We all are reflections of each other as much as we like to think otherwise. We must keep striving, striving, striving–to be better people, not only for our sake, but for the sake of all life and non-life.
God says in public life, or in policy making, there are people who support, and people who get supported. Each role is different, but equally important and necessary. Although one person cannot do both at the same time (or can they?), they can change roles depending upon the circumstance.
God says It does not criticize a religion or its belief structures unless it supports, condones or fosters prejudice and discrimination which leads to enslavement, torture or slaughter.
God says people want to put a face on God. All you need do is look in the mirror to see me. If you are blind, then see me through your mind’s eye, while you stroke your cheek.
We all want it until we get it only to find hell not heaven.
All the glory goes to the rich, until you’re the one chosen by the universe to become rich and you realize with startling clarity that glory is painful.
So often when individuals from minor populations/demographics within a specified geographical location achieve greatness aka privilege, they become distraught with guilt over how they achieved that success – the same way that those whom they called their oppressors achieved it.
Say No To Preferred Status and Preferential Corona/Covid Benefits For Blacks In America.
There are more poor white people than poor black people in America. There are more obese white people with diabetes and high blood pressure than black people with the same.
It isn’t that the CC Virus is targeting black people, or that white people are giving black people The Virus.
It’s their own stupidity that invites The Virus for dinner. It’s their own stupidity that refuses to acknowledge The Virus is nothing more than the flu. It’s their own stupidity that tells them not to give a shit, to go out and mingle in close contact, hugging, touching, masks off, sharing spit, shouting to the air, stomping their feet, dancing in circles, hooting and hollering, waving the air like it’s a rug being beaten.
They go out when everybody else stays home. They want to catch The Virus.
Go ahead spread it around so you can claim racism once again – all based on your own stupidity. Go ahead blame the white man woman child for this too. ‘We’re not gonna let no virus tell us how to live’. Yeah well, stop scamming the government for preferential health benefits for stupidity.
There’s no treatment for stupidity, so don’t waste the tax payers money on those who won’t play by the rules anyway. If you tell them to cover they won’t. It’s who they are. Confrontational. Natural Born Resisters – to everything.
So this is the deal the black representatives put forth, ‘our people are too ignorant and stupid to know about viruses and sickness, so we have to protect those who refuse to protect themselves. We get first dibs on anything virus-connected, so our people don’t die and so they don’t pass it onto others, so they can keep whoring and drug pushing and child smuggling in all the sleazy bars around Cleveland Ohio. You owe us. Jim Crowe owes us. The Thirteen Colonies owe us. Mount Rushmore owes us’.
Well gee, why didn’t you tell us from the beginning that you’re a special needs class plagued with stupidity and ignorance and resistance I might add, since your people spread a lot of that NASTY VIRUS via their respiratory mucous, not droplets, everywhere they burned cities and destroyed people and property. So we’ll slip you into a new category called Handicapped by Race. So you’ll be protected by race and your race will be rightfully deemed a handicap, for which you should receive some hefty benefits.
Think of it as a back door to reparations. The only problem I see is once you walk through that door, there’s no turning back. You will always be viewed by the world as Challenged By Handicap. Maybe you already are.
Yeah I see it now. Constantly rubbing the mucous from your noses onto your clothes and arms and through your hair and stroking each other. Rub the goo on your child’s coat or yours. Don’t have a hanky? Actually, you don’t use tissues or hankies; it’s too complicated. Gloves, mittens work.
They stick their fingers in their eyes a lot too. I see this brother at the bus stop rubbing some kind of goo from a jar in his eyes real hard, like he thinks they can’t get hurt by him poking so hard and rubbing them so hard – to make them red and watery. He’s gonna go blind if he keeps doing that. I want to give him some advice, but I think he does it for money and I don’t have any today. Last time he tried to scam me at the register as I was checking out at Walgreens, he got real aggressive, then promised me he’d go to a meeting, when I called him out on it – after I paid him. A guy like him and countless others need more than a meeting – he needs serious rehab.
Why is it, again, that drug and alcohol treatment isn’t free for anyone who wants it? There is no good reason. Only excuses. Congress can approve multi-trillion dollars in stimulus and relief checks to the wealthiest of companies who should be able to take a hit now and then considering all the money they make, but we can’t make treatment for addiction free. Addicts don’t need affordable treatment. Free treatment is what they need.
Democrats don’t push for that. They tell the states to handle it their way. Mistake. That’s procrastination and pushing the responsibility off onto someone else. When addicted people scream out for help they want and deserve it now, not in a year.
What one has to go through to get it, discourages even the soberest among us when they’re trying to assist a friend or family member. It’s too complicated, which leads me to believe, the process of acceptance is designed to discourage participation. It’s like applying to college. Worse.
What are they afraid of, spending a little money or decreasing liquor sales? If you’re going to advocate for the sale of liquor, then you need treatment programs for those who can’t handle the liquor.
Why no movement on that? Congress thinks everyone gets what they need when they need it?
Congress works with one collective dull brain. It’s not a Republican vs a Democrat issue. Addiction knows no boundaries. If you can bail out states that mismanaged tax payers money by gambling on Wall Street with it, I’d say start the addiction rehabilitation right there. Congress.
Banks do the same thing. They gamble on Wall Street with the money you deposit into your accounts, which they think is theirs. You did not give them permission to do that, so you should get a cut on the returns and less than one percent interest doesn’t come close.
If you want to make a huge withdrawal you can’t, because they gambled your money and lost, and now they have to sell some stock to give you your money. That practice of companies gambling with your money needs to be outlawed. Why did Congress approve it in the first place?
If it’s legal, some Congress somewhere approved it in some bill somewhere.
Yeah yeah, so the real reason Blacks want preferential consideration for anything to do with free benefits is that they don’t know how to follow instructions and they don’t like being told what to do – by anyone, even each other. One black gal told me that’s why Blacks beat their kids, their dogs and each other. It’s the only way they learn. They love them, but they need those beatings to activate the learning process and make the learning stick.
Madison Avenue targets black people with their ads for unhealthy lifestyles and Blacks are flattered. I guess that speaks the volumes I was seeking.
‘So better that you just give us that privilege so we can get on with our business of exploiting everybody. We’re really good at that, but that virus stuff, protection? You mean like condoms? What, you want me to protect you by covering my face? You’re kidding me right? What, you don’t want to see my black skin; I gotta cover it up to protect you? No way Jose, not in this lifetime on this planet. I’m gonna stick it right out there – cough, cough, mucous spreading everywhere.’
He’s so tall, run, all his droplets are falling on us!!! Get out of here, now.
‘Do you get the picture? Okay then, do we have a deal? Those old people are dying anyway, they’re Jim Crowe’s people, let ’em die we say, give their share to us. Or elllse…?’
Or else what?
‘We burn the whole mother fuckin’ plantation down. That’s what.’
The day before Thanksgiving on 25 November 2020 we we’re scheduled for a yearly inspection. It’s always the day before Thanksgiving. Don’t ask me why, except to disrupt poor people the day before a holiday. Make life miserable for the tenants, so they’ll get a job and get out from under the thumb of the government.
The yearly inspection is different from all the others throughout the year, the others being done mostly by banking institutions, but other entities inspect too; we never really know for sure who they are, plus pest inspections and treatments. They enter whether you’re home or not and spray everything. They claim it’s organic, like organically grown produce, so it’s safe. No it isn’t. Biological weapons, even when used in small amounts are not safe.
Complete strangers entering and going through the apartment, looking more at what’s in it…
Once upon a time, in a seven tiny room two story with two attics and a hatchway cellar house with maroon and red asphalt brick siding lived the Davies family.
I didn’t like beets. I didn’t like the traditional New Hampshire/Vermont boiled dinner they called it. My mother did hers in a pressure cooker.
Beets, potatoes, onions, turnips that were really rutabagas that she happened to love no matter the name, green cabbage and carrots all cooked up in a salted broth with a big cube of salt pork with a rind on it, that my mother sliced into perfect cubes that never fell from the rind, but as she long-forked it when it was all done and raised it from the pot to the platter the swollen cubes wiggled to be free, as I saw it, back then, as a child in that interesting asphalt seven room house, that I used to muse now and then, while rocking in the overstuffed to me at least chair looking about, surveying in my mind each room like an architect, that I’d rather have seven tiny rooms than four big rooms, that included by the way a porch my father called it, that was built in when the family grew and a lot of family at least years wise grew there, being that the house was the one my father was born in, raised in and then sold by my grandfather to my father for eight thousand dollars my mother once told me, being a family of five then and grandma and grandpa wanting a newer smaller house all on one floor, they had it built, sun room and all, and did I mention the front door was in my room, but it was mine alone, even though quite small, my closet being a wardrobe down cellar at the foot of the stairs, still it didn’t matter since I wanted my own room even if it had an accordion door that my youngest brother could slither under any time he wanted to come in and I had it locked, so much for privacy, it never bothered me though I did have to keep it clean and neat at all times in case anyone entered the house through the front door, it couldn’t look like a bedroom so I have an original history of changing the looks of things to meet the demand, whatever it is that’s imposed on me from the outside or something I impose upon myself just because I can
I did this as a gift with no hidden writing tips just for your enjoyment and/or amusement. It helps to free the mind up for whatever it needs to be freed up to do
Norman Mailer once said he wrote the longest sentence ever written in a book that he wrote in a segment on the inside of a slaughter house and I being the mildly competitive person with myself that I am and seeing some value to it did him one up, but only in the length department, since mine had little substance except a glimpse inside the mind of a child woman’s memory as it actually was, unadulterated, at the time, in other words the memory didn’t change over time as one might think, and that’s probably the startling view from which I write that prior to this meeting with you I couldn’t define, and probably I’m not defining it very well even now, at least not in standardized terms whereby his, although unadulterated, was a view of horror, mine a view of wanting more or better, sizing up the present situation finding ways to live within the parameters that exist now while reaching in one’s mind’s eye for improvements for later, how would I change the now to look the way I want it to look was always somehow within my reach like it was always just sitting there waiting for me to enter or it to envelope me which triggers in me the thirst for reality that there are many more things we can’t actually see touch feel taste than we allow ourselves to recognize, since nobody else can either, which puts the one who can in a position that makes others uncomfortable all the while they’re asking themselves why they are deficient, which of course they are, we all are, but imagine the confusion not being able to prove anything and the potential for corruption, so I do understand the need for standardization, but as always we humans go way overboard with it, applying it to every minute process all in the same way, making us all look like non-conformist robots, or enemy combatants, because although we are all the same in many respects, it is what makes us different that motivates the world to move in different directions always building a way to survive in spite of ourselves, because we are after all in a world without a beginning or end and as far as we know, we are the only such beings in the universe, or if not, then we can’t see what exists, so we can’t predict based on ourselves, because we don’t understand ourselves, or solely on the laws of physics, and that’s where our intuitive sense of another whole world of realities hits us like a black hole that we can’t see thus our understanding of it keeps changing with new knowledge thus the confusion of what’s real and what isn’t, so why were we created if we can’t use that which we possess to change what went wrong into something better and this is where the answer must come before the question, that answer being, we can, but if you ask ‘why were we created’ the answer is so complex that it would take too long to get it all right, and the question stops the progress anyway, by asking a question you know you can’t answer yet, instead of simply accepting you were created and using your capabilities to do what needs to be done now, while the why answers itself as you go along, it will open up to you as you live and experience it, so there is no need to dissect it when pressing matters need to be addressed and we all possess the capabilities to address them regardless of why I didn’t like my mother’s beets, but liked my father’s, and I know in advance the reader will be comparing genders and family position when it had nothing to do with that – one had an animal in it and the other (Harvard Beets) did not
I didn’t like the taste of salt pork so it wasn’t the beets, but because the beets were so obvious and they always had that salt pork in them and me not liking it transferred that dislike onto to the beets being the cause, but when my father first served Harvard beets at a Sunday dinner, which was our big meal of the week and always at noon after mass, a whole new world opened up to me, a new view on how we come to understand what’s in front of us, that we can actually see and how our interpretations often distort reality and it’s not always about somebody else’s stories where we see inconsistencies and rarely are they outright lies meant to deceive, it’s just the variables themselves though they don’t seek to deceive many times deception is the result, simply by how they are defined, which leads me to the ‘wiggle’, the impression on my brain that although I knew the pig was dead, it presented as a wiggle in my mind when my mother forked it, raised it, shook off the broth and veggies to lay it on the platter, that reminded me that the pig died which meant the pig was at some point alive
Did I tell you the story about the Salmon Wiggle my mother used to make? No? Later, then…
Yes, I will kill a blood-sucking bedbug and not bat an eye – if it enters my space for the purpose of disrupting my life and making me and my family suffer.
If it’s a fifty pound bedbug I’ll kill it before it gets here without batting an eye.
If it’s a hundred pound bedbug I figure they’re bringing reinforcements, so I’ll go to where they live and get them there.
I do this after I’ve had a conversation with those who want to enter. However, there is no negotiation, no debate, no give and take. I simply tell them through telepathic highways of my intention and promise. I give them time to reverse their position. Not long.
I was given bedbugs a few years ago. A new manager showed up – Ms. Z…and proceeded to instruct Orkin on the war game plan against these parasitic blood-suckers. Most everybody had them and if they didn’t they got them.
I remember the Orkin guy telling me to expect them coming in from all directions. They funneled them into my apartment. That was the plan. It took me a month to complete all the instructions on the list given to all tenants, to prepare for Orkin to come in and spray.
Many tenants didn’t prepare; they just let Orkin come in and spray around them, believing, without knowing, what Orkin and apartment management told them, that they used organic solutions harmless to humans and dogs. Many others didn’t have the amount of furniture or office files that I did, so it didn’t take them as long and they certainly didn’t go to a motel the day they sprayed.
Any item which I thought could hide a bedbug or a cluster of bedbugs, rather than take any chances, it went into the dumpster. I made many trips to that dumpster. Even the file cabinet went, the DVD/CD stereo went. No more music for us. Furniture went, blankets, clothes I had stored in closets.
I did copious shredding of private notes, that were nobody’s business and served as raw material from which to write my essays and commentary. If we’re gone overnight anybody had access. We didn’t have a security system back then. I could always tell when somebody had entered nosing around. I could smell their cologne or sweat.
I went through every nook and cranny of my living space.
And yes, it did disrupt my life, Steve’s and Rose’s.
The bites; yes there were many. The itching and scratching was torturous.
Each time they spayed, Steve and I with Rose went to a motel for the night.
I killed many bedbugs – on the ceiling, the upper walls, the doorways, the lower walls – leaving a smudge mark where they died, so the Orkin people could see their pattern of entry. They were even rising up from the carpet – in several locations – in every room.
The manager, Ms. Z…, was brutal in her approach, even threatened me with eviction because in her words I wasn’t cooperating. “Those are your bedbugs”, she kept saying, “you’re hurting the rest of the tenants by not letting us in”.
To prepare? As the instructions told me to do? Is that how I wasn’t cooperating, Ms. Z…?
I don’t know how much more I could have cooperated. I wanted to know what they were spraying and they wouldn’t provide it. I have a neurological disorder and don’t want to be breathing in poisons. Finally, after much arguing on the phone to all parties, Orkin conceded and sent me print-outs of what was sprayed in the building, not in my apartment.
What was sprayed in my apartment was evidently secret and controlled by the defense department, since they use those sprays for biological warfare? And too much trouble for them to figure it out? To prevent lawsuits?
The ones doing the spraying simply picked up their canisters at Orkin not knowing what was in them and proceeded to spray? They kept giving me the same line about the solutions being harmless to humans and dogs.
The last time they sprayed, after they had sealed all the cracks where the ceilings meet the walls and drilled into door and baseboard mouldings depositing poisons, Steve and I with Rose left for the motel, once again.
Orkin went in and as the maintenance guy told me when I returned home the next day, “we sprayed the ‘shit’ out of your apartment. We even started coughing and had to leave”.
As I sat on the couch I kept feeling the residue from the spray on my skin and could even taste it. The apartment had a light haze throughout. Every single item in my living space had been sprayed. Kitchen too, everything.
That was the end of that.
Not quite though.
In researching the compounds listed, I discovered that the spray they used causes dehydration in the bedbugs rendering them unable to procreate and to eventually die.
I was concerned with my thirst – so thirsty, unquenchable thirst. Nothing I could do about it but keep drinking, keep washing my skin. The membranes in my nose and throat were dry all the time. My lips were sticking together. I was coughing incessantly.
The Orkin guy who previously worked in New York city told me he used compounds for the last spray not usually approved, but they funneled so many bedbugs into my apartment, that he decided to use it. “Don’t worry”, he said, “you’ll never have a bedbug problem again – maybe some stragglers that will only require some baseboard spraying.
While in the elevator one day, I was talking to another tenant, and he said, “so you finally got them too?”.
“Yeah, an army of them”, I replied.
That wasn’t the end of it. I noticed Rose drinking more water. Lots of it. She wasn’t as hungry as usual. This went on and on for months. She got weaker and weaker. Was always walking to the water bowl in search of water.
She started sleeping closer to me at night, letting me wrap my arms around her and cradle her body against mine as I slept on my side.
I’d hear her getting up several times to go for water. She started having problems walking. She could no longer simply go to the bowl and drink.
She had to turn around, and around slowly, till she was close enough to the bowl to sit where she could also reach the bowl to drink from it. It was like an engineering feat each time she did it, judging distance and how many turns she’d have to make.
For months she did that round-about to lower herself to the bowl so she could sit while drinking, instead of stand as she always previously did. I can still see her do that in my mind’s eye. She was losing strength rapidly.
Steve and I had the discussion, about euthanizing her. Maybe we waited too long. Steve was getting anxious about it and we quarreled often.
One day I decided to take the grocery cart from downstairs that was available for tenant use. I lined it with pillows and blankets, building it up high enough to elevate her, so Rose could see what was around her. Then waited longer – how long I don’t recall.
When I thought it was getting close to letting-go-time. Steve and I thought we should take Rose outside in the cart. Let her feel the fresh air and breeze on her fragile body, let her enjoy all her surroundings one more time. We also used it as a dry run to the Vet’s office which wasn’t far away, so when we took her the final time, the trip would be familiar to her.
On the way home, I had Steve take one last picture of Rose, our daughter, with me her adopted mother. Yes, Rose adopted us as much as we adopted her.
Still we waited, and we tried not to quarrel in front of Rose. I told Steve that when it was time, Rose would tell me. She hadn’t yet. Steve trusted that, knowing how close we were. Each night in bed I would talk to her telepathically, knowing she could hear my soothing thoughts while I held her body close to mine.
I didn’t sleep much back then.
Then one night Rose got up and tried to walk, sideways, as she had come to do. Half way to the drinking bowl she let out a blood-curdling scream that I will never forget and still hear in my mind’s ear. I knew then what we had to do.
The next morning we made haste. Wrapping her up and placing her in the grocery cart, we walked her to the Vet’s office, talking to her, soothing her all the way.
There were four of us in the room. Steve and I said our goodbyes. Steve was too emotional to stay for the rest.
I stayed as the doctor took her head in her hands stroking her, then moved back wanting Rose to only have eyes for her. Rose responded to the kindness.
The doctor left. I stayed until Rose wanted me to leave.
We left with an empty cart and two empty hearts.
Bedbug sprays meant to dehydrate the enemy dehydrated our daughter Rose resulting in a long slow painful death.
She set the terms however, right to the end, staying as long as she could before traveling to the great beyond. I am so proud of her fight, her stamina, her adaptation, her will to survive. The most gentle being – to all creatures – who stood in crowds of strangers, never showing fear or trepidation.
Rose was a working dog.
In the end, Ms. Z…called, spoke to Steve and told him to apologize to me for her behavior. She said, “tell your wife, I know they weren’t her bedbugs”. She was very sorry about it all.
It wasn’t long after that she was either fired or quit. Some tenants thought she had been brought in specifically to wage war against the terrorists of the insect world.
Recently when Orkin entered to do prophylactic spraying for cockroaches, the guy sprayed right into Lilly Belle’s water dish – had I not been there, I never would have known.
Of course I should have removed it, but I forgot and frankly was appalled that when he saw what he did, he just moved onto the bathroom as if it was okay; “it won’t kill your dog”.
Do ethical vegan Jews consider ethics when forming opinions, making decisions, forming policy, about what happens to the Palestinians – people whom non-ethical animal-eating Jews consider pests? Or do they extend the same ethical considerations to all creatures – including all human creatures?